Quotes 2002

Thanks to BriAnne and Jenn for sending these along, and to all those who took quotes.

Slot 1 - Friday, 1:00 p.m. to 5:00 p.m.

On Her Majesty's Secret Service 3: Tir Raker

GMs: JP Brannan and Ian Ng
Devlin Gemini-6: Michael Curry
Octavian "Skip" Gemini-8: Sean McCabe
Harmony Gemini-9: Jennifer Jackson
Cyril Gemini-27: Mark Toigo

"If you ever want to know who the villains in this game are, I've got this Powerpoint presentation." - JP (GM) to Ian (GM)

"Go for it, cereal...I mean, Cyril. I didn't mean to say that." - Michael
"Okay, Agent Grapenuts..." - Ian
"K. Special K." - Michael

"Oh, man. He got much more detailed about the balls." - Ian

"Racked balls." - Ian
"Named and numbered balls. Balls....ubiquitous throughout shadow." - Mark
"I think Oberon has those." - Michael

"We fake our own deaths....in a very realistic fashion." - Michael

"He's launching his balls of fiery doom." - JP

"Do you give yourself an order and then say aye-aye captain?" - Sean
"Yes, I do. I'm quite, quite mad." - Michael

"I have an idea. I'm going to shoot at the explosives." - Mark, spying the floating barge of explosives next to Tir
"That's not a good idea." - Sean
"No, no - he didn't say good." - Michael
"We've saved Tir. Oh....wait...." - Jennifer

"They're pretty sure Corwin's insane." - JP
"It took analysis to figure this out?" - Jennifer

Mementos of Amber

GM: Jack Gulick
Caine: Will Wagner
Jurt: JJ
Merlin: Elissa Ayadi
Luke: Bridgette Ruggles
Coral: Deb Allen
Julia: Julia Frizzell

"I cry insincerely." - Merlin, on not contacting Corwin via Trump.

"I tell Luke to look at the Pattern with the Pattern. Look at the Grand Curve. I don't say that I messed it up." - Merlin

"I can kill Caine...?" - Merlin, after Caine pushes Julia onto the Pattern.

"Jurt is scratching madly at the door." - Jurt, after Merlin summons the Logrus to combat those walking the Pattern.

"Go squiggly cord, go!" - Merlin to Frakir.

"Don't talk to her. She's an evil bitch." - Merlin on Julia
"So you're evil. How's that working out for you?" - Jurt

"Frakir is as far from the Jewel as one can be..." - GM describing Frakir pulling the Jewel away.

"It's a shoelace that moves." - Elissa on Frakir.

"I won't catch you." - Luke to Caine, as they debate about who gets the Jewel first, if Caine were to fall off the wall.

Jurt Trumps Mandor. No answer.
Jurt Trumps Merlin. Merlin smacks him upside the head.
(oft repeated)

"Who are you?"
"Coral. Who are you?"
"Julia."
Rinaldo makes introductions.
(oft repeated)

"I look at the Pattern with the Pattern." - Merlin.
(oft repeated)

"Here, let me lick that up for you." - Jurt to Merlin, when Merlin whines about his bloody wrist.

"I turn around and punch Jurt." - Merlin

"Merlin's always thinking with his dagger." - GM

"I take it you two know each other as well." - Coral
"Unfortunately." - Merlin and Julia in unison

"I get patted down by him in one hour, and sucked by him in the next..." - Caine

"So you tried to slit your wrists." - Coral

"Yeah, and I couldn't even do that right. Boy am I a loser." - Merlin.
No rebuttals or comments from anyone else.

"I really should have listened to his reasoning first." - Jurt
"Oh yes, listen to Merlin." - Julia
Eyes roll around the room.

"Good grief, Jurt was right!" - JJ on realizing the reason he threw the Jewel was accurate.

"I didn't think 'send me where you want to send me' meant 'burn in hell.'" - Coral

"Although I'm Merin. I dunno, I'm pretty dumb." - Elissa

"You've just put reality and anti-reality in the same room." - GM

"Lead-flavored jello?" - GM

"Stupid strangly cord. Why do you keep doing that?" - Merlin/Elissa
"Because Frakir knows what's going on and we don't." - Deb

"Protesting as vociferiously as Frakir can, which involves a lot of squeezing." - GM

Much Ado About Benedict

"Duh... she's purdy..." - first DJ, but quite a few people afterwards
re: Ophelia

Slot 2 - Friday, 7:00 p.m. to midnight

To 'Scape the Serpent's Tongue

"Hermia!" - Lysander
"Well, now I know my name." - BriAnne

"My narcoleptic boyfriend." - Hermia, about Lysander

"My Lord, my Master, my God." - Lysander, to Demetrius, after an accident with love juice.

"His true colors show." - GM Bridgette
"Yeah, rainbow!" - BriAnne, as Lysander lusts after Demetrius

"The fairy leaves." - DJ
"The real fairy leaves. The fairy-made-fairy is still there." - GM Bridgette
"Now you know why they're called fairies." - GM Deb

"The mortals, with Helena in the lead, are hunting for the voice that was throwing squirrels." - GM Bridgette

"Will you stop talking?"
"You're still talking."
"And you, with the talking."
"SSH!"
Homicidal look.
- Hermia to Lysander

"That sounds right." - Helena, every time someone disses Puck or Bottom.

"That wasn't it." - Oberon to Titania, after getting some.

The Shadow Over Amber

GMs: Michael Curry, Jennifer Jackson
Dworkin Armitage: Lou Evans
Eric de la Poer: Will Wagner
Deirdre de la Poer: Julia Frizzell
Brand West: Elissa Ayadi
Fiona West, Gerard: Sean McCabe
Bleys West: Mark Lowell
Caine Tepes, Oberon de la Poer: Matt Andrews
Random Flaumel: Jack Gulick
Julian Whitechapel: Kevin Allen
Benedict Pons: Corey Araujo

"The library's generally closed in the evening. Perhaps you could come in the morning." Dworkin to Caine, not yet aware that Caine is a vampire

"I'm not entirely sure why they call it a sport if the animals aren't armed." Dworkin to Julian, concerning great game hunting

"Don't get me started - blah. I'll never stop - blah." Caine
"One, one dead Amberite. Two, two dead Amberites." Corey and Elissa

"I think thinking is very important." - Benedict Pons, world's greatest detective

"Crinos, obfuscating, flipping you off." - Corey (much better with the LARP hand symbols)

"I'll take the redhead. Not usually a good thing to do in an Amber game." - Kevin

"Random, Julian and I had a good time last night" - Eric
"That's just a scary thought in the Amber universe. Amberslash!" - Julia

"You discover that although he drives very badly; he also drives very slowly. You have time to step out of the car before the accident occurs." Michael to Kevin on Dworkin's driving.
"Julian stomps on the gas." - Kevin

"Evil or not evil?" - Michael
"It's more fun where they're going. Evil later." - Jennifer
"She really *is* the GM of love." - Julia

"I'm the eye-candy in the corner." - Elissa, on Brand

"She smiles demurely and cackles in her mind." - Elissa, on the serving girl she's currently controlling.

"It's 10 o'clock, and this is only the first arson." - Michael, disgusted

"There's a werewolf and a vampire on the top of your car." - Michael, to Fiona
"This looks very bad." - Julian, chasing Fiona's car

"Jenn, can I kill a PC?" - Michael
"You're supposed to." - Jennifer
"But I wanted the GM's approval." - Michael
"You *are* the GM." - Jennifer
"She's the GM of love. He's the evil GM." - Julia, still trying to convince everyone

"It's entirely possible that Eric may be dangerous." - Dworkin
Michael chokes on a pretzel.
Eric, overhearing, laughs.

"Did you see what they did to your house? Did you see what they did to your dad?" - Oberon
"No...but if they hadn't, I probably would have." - Eric

"It's going to be quite a challenge shoving her off." - Random to Eric, re: Deirdre

"Deirdre, I thought you'd like to know that the house burned down." - Eric
"I do not go "WHAT??!" - Deirdre, hiding in the wardrobe.

"I'm so coming back as Gerard and ripping your arms off." - Sean to Will when Eric shoots Fiona.
"You can't show up and instantly attack Eric." - Michael
"I know, but I can run really fast." - Sean

"I'm going to scry Brand. He's the only one I haven't found yet." - Gerard
"You're Brand." - Michael
"I hate that. I beat the shit out of myself." - Gerard

"Random's everywhere. Like God." - Michael when Julian tries to scry Random

Slot 3 - Saturday, 10:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m.

BC3: The Fifth Element

GMs: Deb Atwood, Jennifer Jackson
Jinx, son of Gerard: Toigo
Leo, the Rich Kid, son of Corwin: JP Brannan
Cindy, the Bimbo, daughter of Brand: Rebekah Morales
Demeter, daughter of Finndo: Bridgette Ruggles
Bryony, daughter of Flora: Brianne Searles
Kevin, son of Random: Mark Lowell
Nigel, the Brain, son of Brand: Glen Seymour

"I was playing Unicorn-man. At one point, my ability to track down virgins came in very handy." - JP, OOC
"But did they *stay* virgins after you found them, Unicorn-man?" - Rebekah, OOC
"The origin of my superpowers was that I had been poked by a radioactive unicorn." - JP

"Mac, your boyfriend is faking the Pattern." - JP

"We're not the real Amber. We're the emergency inflatable back-up Amber." - JP

"So, what do you do?" - Bryony to Jynx
"I can overhear other people's thoughts." - Jynx
Bryony stares hard at Jynx.
"Yes, I do." - Jynx

"Bleys....dad....do either of you do weird things?" - Cindy
The whole group laughs.
"Fiona doesn't count." - Rebekah, OOC.

"Hey....this book isn't really here, is it?" - Nigel
"You're brilliant, aren't you?" - Jennifer
"Yes. I am." - Nigel, matter-of-factly

"She *did* appear to Cindy." - Demeter
"They give you twin dirty looks." - Deb, commenting on Bleys and Brand
"Demeter is unaffected." - Bridgette

"So, as Bleys and Brand arrive, you're patting down Fiona." - Deb, commenting on Leo
"Take notes, boys." - JP

Justice Society of Amber

GM: Louis Evans
Carl Corey, Soldier of Fortune, aka The Silver Rose, Two-Fisted Phantom: Michael Curry
Bennett Ictkenshtein, Janitor, aka The Living Weapon, Master of Mayhem: Dustin Crewell
Anthony Caine, INTERPOL, aka Shadow, Man of a 1,000 Faces: Corey Araujo
Randy Irwin, Gambler, aka Chance, the World's Luckiest Man: Will Wagner
Dyballa M’Benga, aka Black Valkerie: Ian Ng
Eric Runs-Like-Wolf, aka Red Wolf: Jack Gulick
Ivan Gerardovic, Farmer, aka Kolvir, The Man Mountain: just john
Evelyn Flaumel, Socialite, aka La Belle Dame, Fiery Lady of Liberté: Julia Frizzell
The FURIES:
Alpha Model ‘Brandroid’: Kevin Hudson
Beta Model ‘Brandroid’: Kevin Allen
Gamma Model ‘Brandroid’: Sean "Kevin" McCabe

"I don't think I can do an Italian accent." - Corey
(discussion of various kinds of Italian accents, such as New York)
"Think Mario. Luigi." - Michael
"Huh?" - Corey
"I'ma Shadow, I'ma gonna win!" - Lou

"She's Lintra, uses her power to control men's minds." - GM
"She's a lawyer?" - Jeanne, kibbitzing

"Do we know what his (Logrus, the Serpent-King) powers are?" - Sean
"He commands all the serpents on top of Mt. Everest?" - Jack
"To me, my frozen serpent minions!" - GM

"When we voted him leader for life, we didn't think it'd stick!" - Jack on The Silver Rose's leadership potential

"Does he have a silver surfboard?" - Will
"He doesn't need a surfboard. (beat) He's got a unicycle!" - GM
"A unicycle, with the Power Cosmic!" - Michael

"There's restraint harnesses?" - Michael
"What did you think those strappy-things on the seats were for?" - GM
"They're for the Black Valkerie!" - Julia

"They (the missiles) strike the shuttle. Cut to the small plastic figurine of the shuttle exploding." - GM

"Welcome to New Jersey. No spitting." - on a sign as Shadow, The Living Weapon, and Chance as they enter New Jersey.

"There's a sign on the moon as you land. No spitting." - GM

"The big robot spits explosive bullets..." - GM
"Hey, no spitting!" - jj

"This time I will kill you for good!" - Logrus, the Serpent-King, to The Silver Rose
"But you're working for evil!" - jj

Slot 4 - Saturday, 8:00 p.m. to midnight

Amber: The West Wing

GM: JP Brannan
Lord Joshua Feldane, Lord Privy Seal: Michael Curry
Sir Sam Seymour, Peer Relations: Lou Evans
Lord Tobias Zesner, Communications Dir.: Toigo
Claudia Jean Crager, Public Affairs Secretary: Jennifer Jackson
Donnatella Mikaelis, Sr Assistant: Bridgette Ruggles

"My head hurts." - Toigo
"You shouldn't have bought such a small one, then. It obviously doesn't fit." - Lou

"You see, the family may deem security arrangements an insult." - JP
"In other words, you're saying she can't take care of herself." - Jennifer
"But I am a weak and effeminate Amberite, so I need as many bodyguards as I can get. They're for me." - Lou

"Donna, call Leo and tell him we're on our way." - Joshua
"And how am I supposed to do that?" - Bridgette, OOC
"And now you are faced with the problem of running West Wing in a medieval level society." - Michael, and then IC, as Joshua, "Donna, we're going to see Leo."
"Access the intern net. It has a bandwith problem. The corridors are too narrow." - Lou

"Okay. Until I made a dumb joke about it, he didn't give me the sheet of paper that tells me what my job is." - Michael

"They have an unusual population issue." - Claudia
"What sort of issue?" - Sam
"90% of all children born are female." - Claudia
"I take a few minutes off during my lunch break to request a transfer." - Lou

Welcome to Hogwarts

GMs: Jack Gulick, Jeanne Thelwell

Ravenclaw:
Faile Quinn: BriAnne Searles
Vanessa Darlington: Julia Frizzell
Kip Ellsworth: Dustin Crewell

Slytherin:
Sebastian Pullam: Will Wagner

Gryffindor:
Alfred Mangonet: Jim Smith

Hufflepuff:
Malcolm Ivanoff: Kevin Hudson
Gerard Macamber: just john
Caleb Giger: Sean McCabe
Emma Amberson: Fiona

"What's a 'gerry'?" - Fiona, reading Caleb's note
"Short for Gerard!" - Sean

"I think an essay on the place of self-control in the development of a young wizard is called for." - Prof. McGonagall
"How long should this essay be, Professor?" - Vanessa
"As long as needed. You're a Ravenclaw, aren't you?" - McGonagall
"Yes, Professor." - Vanessa

"Who ate Peeves' candy?" - Jeanne
Vanessa, Faile, Gerard raise their hands.
"Faile notices that her pages of notes are now blank." - Jeanne
Twin shrieks from the Ravenclaw girls.

On the purchase of a QuickQuill:
"You ask him (Caleb), he likes you." - Vanessa to Faile

"I walk into the (girls') bathroom." - Caleb
Twin shrieks from the Ravenclaw girls.

"What do you think? If he (Gerard) does an essay on the 7th Goblin Uprising, will it be the same as doing one each on the 3rd and 4th?" - Jack to Jeanne

"They're being sneaky Ravenclaws. You should be very afraid." - Julia

"We're plotting! By the end of this, we're going to have well-detailed maps and diagrams!" - Julia

"His chair is backwards." - Caleb
"They don't have chairs, they have benches." - Jack
"His bench is backwards, just because!" - Caleb

"It's an elephant for your porpoises?" - several people
"NO!! It's IRRELEVENT for my PURPOSES!!" - BriAnne

"And that is why Ravenclaws don't plot." - Julia, when the plot goes badly.

"Are there mirrors on the ceiling?" - Julia, as the group enters the hall of mirrors.
"No, there are not mirrors on the ceiling!" - Jack and Jeanne
Everyone does porno music.

"You're not the GM of Love at all!" - Jack to Jeanne
"No, Jenn's the GM of Love." - Julia
"No, I'm the GM of Mean." - Jeanne

Amber in Love

GM: DJ Hyland
Aria: Elissa Ayadi
Lexie: Nikki Gustas
Maximillian, son of Flora: Corey Araujo
Jason: Matt Andrews
Bobbi, daughter of Brand: Liz Wilson
Paris: Glen Seymour
MacAllen: Ian Ng
Jenny: Deb Atwood

"No rude gestures with the monkey." -- Liz

"Hey baby, why you messin' with my groooove." -- Jason to Lexie

"Bobbi, these six are yours. This one is mine." -- Lexie

"I suspect you're fairly good at following orders?" -- Lexie
"You bet!" -- Paris/Lila, cheerily
"Good..." -- Lexie smiles

"And that, children, is why you don't chew condoms while on drugs." -- Elissa

"Late last night Julian was sat upon by forces unknown..." -- What we *heard* the GM say

"No, I have clinging and I was holding onto it in a secret way." -- Glen

"This post-it is my Trump. You are trying to Trump a post-it." -- Elissa

"Stop spanking the monkey." -- Elissa

"I grab a pillow and a blanket and throw it over us. And I flick my thing on." -- Elissa

"Now the monkey is spanking itself." -- Deb

"The earth moved..." -- Jenny, sleepily
"It wasn't *that* good." -- Aria

"I bleed on Dworkin." -- Glen, for Aria

"You have some medical training. It's part of hosting a party." -- GM to Maximilian

"I really shouldn't have had sex with Dworkin." -- Aria

"That wasn't my fault. I know, I asked." -- Aria

"That is true. The more arms you have, the more useful things you can do." -- GM to Glen

"Oh dear god, we need someone to fall in love with Dworkin." -- Jenny

"Raise your hand if you're naked." -- GM

"I'm gorgeous!" -- In chorus

"What form do you take to seduce the unicorn? Dworkin."

"But the doom monsters that I was dooming go away to doomland?" -- Aria

"Aw crap, they fixed it. I mean YAY!" -- Aria

"I grunt at Gerard." -- Jason
"Gerard grunts back." -- GM

"You wear kakhi tights and a blue vest." -- Nikki
"They're from Amber-crombie and Fitch." -- GM

"My Mistress! My Love! My Goddess!" -- suitor to Lexie
"My god!" *WHAM* -- Lexie & Lexie's fist to suitor

"Any time. *ANY* time." -- Jason to Jenny

"Jenny is a rabid artist." Pause. "Rabid, not rabbit!" -- Deb

Slot 5 - Sunday, 10:00 a.m. to 2:00 p.m.

On Her Majesty's Secret Service 4: The Man with the Golden Sword

GM: JP Brannan
Lex, Cabra Intelligence Force: Jack Gulick
Octavian, Gemini-8: Sean McCabe
Richard "Dick" Moby, transferred from Rebman Special Forces, Gemini-762: Lou Evans
Devlin, Gemini-6: Michael Curry
Harmony, Gemini-9: Jennifer Jackson

"We take the Zeppelin." - Michael
"Oh, yeah. Cause that's inconspicuous." - Sean
"It doesn't say Rebman Secret Service on the side. It says....Good Year Horseshoes." - Michael
"Anti-lock hooves. Very important." - Jack

"That's your job. Blow him up." - Dick, to Harmony, about the young Duke
"So, I shouldn't infiltrate him?" - Harmony
"You can infiltrate him as many times as you want to. Just make sure you blow him up before you're done." - Dick

"What do they do for a good time in a dump like this?" - Lex
"They rebuild their shattered lives." - JP

"I want those sunglasses so I can see the backs of the cards." - Sean
"So....normal ones, then..." - JP
"No, no. The other backs of the cards." - Sean

"Tell my wife I'm sorry I ever met her." - Dick
"I don't want to quote *that* out of context." - Jennifer

"I lose vast amounts of money; mostly to Bleys." <pause> "I want him to like me and think I suck." - Octavian, about playing baccarat with Bleys at the casino
<laughter>
"No, that's not what I meant. You all have dirty, dirty minds." - Sean

"He's becoming coherent again," - Michael, about the GM
"Quick, throw oranges at him." - Jack

"Does Bleys have a golden sword?" - Sean
"Yes." - JP
"I say, hey....nice sword. But not like that." - Sean

"You take off, and we have a villain's only scene that you're not privy to, but the audience enjoys greatly." - JP

"If they're already dead, they can't be assassinated." - Dick, on a plan to kill the targets before the bad guys get to them

"Lou, I've actually forgotten your.....Dick." - JP to Lou, trying to remember the name of Lou's character

A Crystal Silence

On hangovers:
"I expel my hangover into your breakfast." - Random/Matt

On Random vomiting on breakfast:
"I expedite his departure in the most painful way possible." - Gerard/Nicole
"Ow." - Random/Matt
"And then I grunt in a way that says, 'You deserved it.'" - Gerard/Nicole

On Brand's taste in art:
"So, I'm in Brand's rooms, not able to eat paint and staring at a naked picture of Benedict?" - Gerard/Elissa

On getting play:
"I trump Dworkin." - Llewella/Glenn
"There is no response." - GM
"Has anyone ever gotten a response from Dworkin." - Ian
"OOOOOOOH YEEEEEEAAAAH!" - Corey

When the world breaks:
"Brand, what did you do?" - Everyone at some point in time.

On being Florimel:
"We hear a beautiful sound and all of a sudden we're people with no fashion senses" - Flora/Nicole

On incest:
"Dear sweet Deirdre!" - Corwin/Matt
"Oh Christ!" - Deirdre/BriAnne.

On showing who's the man:
"Who's your brother!" - Corey

At the edge of the Abyss:
"Brand! Was this part of the plan?" - Dierdre/BriAnne
"The plan was not to get killed!" - Brand/Elissa
"Fuck. I think we messed up the plan!." - Dierdre/BriAnne

Quick, King check:
"Deirdre, who is king?" - GM
(looks around the office, leans back in the chair, smug) "Apparently I am." Dierdre/BriAnne

A confused subordinate to Brand:
"MY LEIGE!!!" Gerard/Elissa

An angry, confused subordinate of Brand:
"GERARD SMASH!!!!!" - Gerard/Elissa